I'm still alive and I'm not anyone's bitch.
My teefers have been fixed so there was no need to maul my dentist. It's a shame, because I was readying myself for a little vacay in the slammer.
I hear they have better cable than I do.
Anywho, I had a fun weekend full of good ole hillbilly family time.
Yes, I am a hillbilly and I'm not ashamed.
My parents, my big brother, his wife and I all went to the local fair to see a little country star that you might be familiar with...Mr. Alan Jackson!
My Mom looooooooves Alan Jackson, so it was pretty much a given that we would be going to the fair to see him. There's no way she could miss this chance.
MB decided not to partake in the hillbilly happenings. He can tolerate bluegrass, but he just can't handle straight up country. It's like he's got something against rednecks.
Yes, there is a difference between hillbillies and rednecks.
It's difficult to explain, but it's kinda like a nature vs nurture thing. I'll get into it some other time. It's very complicated.
Anywho, I'm not sure where you were this weekend, but it was super hot in my neck of the woods this weekend.
Perfect weather to walk around a fair full of smelly farm animals and fried foods, right?
Yeah. Not so much.
My Mom must have been angry at us for some reason. She wanted us to meet at 3:00 for a 7:30 concert. That's 4 1/2 hours to spend walking around the hot, smelly fair.
I'm blaming my brother. There is nothing I could have done to piss her off that much. It has to be him.
So, after about an hour of sweating and being miserable, we decided to hit the casino that is conveniently right on the fairgrounds.
Air conditioning and the chance to win a fortune and retire from the crisis biz forever?
It turns out that penny slots aren't the dream makers I imagined them to be. $26.47 is not quite enough to get me out of the crisis biz.
It's okay. I got to see Alan Jackson.
I tried to take a picture of the lovely Mr. Jackson, but my blackberry was not having it.
I did get a picture of the lovely port-a-potty trailer that was directly in my line of vision.
I don't think all the occupants of said port-a-potty trailer realized that they were center stage.
I kept hoping someone would come out of the door and give us a proper stage exit but it didn't happen.
Is it too much to ask for a little post flush fanfare for the crowd?
Wanna see Mr. Jackson performing one of my favorite songs?
Are you an Alan Jackson fan? If so, what's your favorite song?
Not a country fan? Tell me how you would have provided a little post flush fanfare for the crowd.