I'm pretty sure a head injury and the subsequent near death experience excuses all of my questionable behavior for the next 4-6 weeks.
You see, I took a ricer to the face 5 days ago and it's making me do bad things.
What's a ricer, you ask?
Well, it's this...
It's metal. It's heavy. It should really never be contained precariously in a box on the top shelf of any closet.
You see, when I decided to reorganize my kitchen and put some stuff away, I had to access such a box on the top shelf of my closet.
That's when I lost the ability to do basic subtraction.
I reached for the box. I felt the smack of metal hitting my face with full impact and I got really dizzy.
I saw little birds flying around my head.
Okay. Not really. I did see spots though. For like an hour.
I also cursed like I've never cursed before and felt a pain like I've never know. I mean, I've never been punched in the face before. If it's anything like taking a ricer to the face...I'm just not interested.
It also isn't pretty. This is what my face looked like afterwards...
That's not even a good picture of the injury! I got a much better picture of it, but it's a full face shot and it actually looks like a mug shot. A real life mug shot.
Did I mention that I have to get my driver's license renewed in the next 10 days? Yeah. I do.
MB has been nothing but supportive, of course. He takes every opportunity to point out how red my nose is. How funny it is that I lost a battle with an inanimate object. How clumsy I am...it just never ends.
So, the whole point of this post was to check in and update you on my life, since I've been absent from here for a few days.
Somehow, my nose took over.
I blame that on the three shots of Canadian whiskey I partook of tonight during MB's firehouse party, which happened to be at our house.
Yep. I'm a lush.
Tomorrow, I am hosting a family dinner for my parents, my brother (who is also a member of the firehouse and is currently passed out in my guest room), my aunt and my cousin at my house.
If I survive the day, I will be back to chat some more tomorrow. That whiskey is making me have to backspace an awful lot and that makes me dizzy.
I'm going to eat another cupcake and go lay down.
*Please remember that a ricer to the face can cause people to do strange things, such as consume large amounts of whiskey and then try to form a coherent sentence.