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Monday, October 25, 2010

The Beast takes me for a ride.

So, I had a roller coaster of a day on Sunday.

It started out really well. MB and I slept in a little and then got up to do Day 12 of the Couch to 5K. It was absolutely gorgeous outside and we had an awesome run.

It was 2 3 minute runs and 2 5 minute runs and we ran each of them all the way through. We kicked butt and it felt so good! I wasn't even hyperventilating as much as I usually do. Of course, I still had my breathe right strip on, so I was still pretty sexy.

MB likes it when I step things up now and then.

Anysexkitten, after we ran, we went home to get ready for my parents who were coming up to visit.

Usually, it takes them at least 3 hours to find their way to my house which is exactly 2 hours from their house. They like to take their time.

Today, they were right on time. By the time we got showered and I was about to eat breakfast, they showed up.

We chatted for a few minutes and then they wanted to go to my cousin's house to see her for a little bit.

Now, I had eaten a little pack of nuts and a banana before we ran. That's all I had eaten and it had long worn off. My plan was to eat something before they came, but that just didn't happen.

I could feel The Beast looming.

One of my biggest migraine triggers is not eating. If I miss a meal and don't fuel my body properly, it hits. And it usually hits hard and fast.

So, I scarf down an apple and at least get dinner in the crockpot before we head over to my cousin's house. I also popped a half a migraine pill just to head it off a little bit.

I could have easily said 'Hey, I need to eat a little something because I'm getting migrainey.' My parents would have understood. They certainly know what The Beast does to me. They would've been happy to wait.

Of course, they also would've been handling me with kid gloves all afternoon and trying to cut their visit short so I could rest.

So, being the dumbass that I am, I kept my mouth shut.

Off we go to my cousin's house. I was navigating while my Dad drove us there. My Dad has a tendency to speed and then slam on the brakes for stop signs, red lights, speed bumps, other cars, squirrels, etc.

That kind of jostling back and forth is not the best when you are trying to fight off a migraine. It only tends to add to the nausea. Not a good thing.

I'm cracking windows and closing my eyes and praying for a road with no speed bumps. It was futile. The Beast was coming and it was coming hard.

Again...I could've said something. But noooo.

So, we hang out with my cousin for awhile. She is a little younger than my Dad and is going through a really rough time. Her brother just died along with a few of her close friends and she is struggling. She's not sleeping. She's smoking like a chimney (another bad trigger for The Beast) and she's trying to tell us all about it.

Of course, she has family and friends that are popping in and out, along with four dogs that are running around on the floor, along with four other conversations that are going on at the same time...it was the perfect storm for The Beast.

Over stimulation. Cigarette smoke. Stomach jostling. Having to answer the 'when are you going to have kids?' questions.

The Beast was definitely feeding off of this.

By the time we left, I was starving and I took us to Subway for lunch. I had to eat or I was going to lose it. Quickly.

My little six inch tuna sub satisfied The Beast initially. I was able to hold it together until my parents left an hour or so later.

Once they hit the road, I grabbed my ice pack, took another migraine pill and hit the couch.

Of course, The Beast had fully taken over by now and he was punishing me for trying to ignore him all day. He let me have it full force.

It was an all out battle between him and the meds. The meds were trying to do their thing. They made me so sleepy that I could barely keep my eyes open and I was stumbling around like I was drunk. They wanted me to sleep, but The Beast had other plans.

The Beast had a hold of my head and he wasn't letting go. He was squeezing me so tight, it felt like my head was in a vise. He was bringing on the nausea with everything he had. No matter what I did - sitting, standing, pacing, lying down - it was there. It was not going to let me rest until it had it's way with me.

I ended up lying on the bathroom floor with my head on the sink. I had been through this before and I knew there was no use in fighting. It was going to happen and I might as well be ready.

It hit. It hit hard. It hit so hard that not only was I praying to the porcelain God for the next 20 minutes, I was also praying for it to just be over. The Beast had decided to attack my sinuses while I was vomiting uncontrollably. Nosebleeds always freak me out, especially when they are happening while I am no condition to do anything about them and I just have to let them bleed.

The Beast really is a son of a bitch.

I was crying and I was scared and I was humiliated and I just wanted it to stop. If I had been able to, I would've crawled to the phone to call MB because I couldn't fight anymore. The Beast had won.

Thank God, he decided to release his hold on me shortly after that. Maybe he sensed my defeat.

When MB got home, I was passed out on the couch. Defeated. Broken.

Once I woke up and got my bearings though, I was fine. MB and I had dinner and all was right with the world.

I had battled The Beast and lost but at least I lived to fight another day.

Hopefully it won't be any day soon.

I don't think I could survive another battle like that one anytime soon.

If you would like to read more about my migraine affliction and why I choose to share it with you, click on 'The Beast' in my labels.

3 comments:

  1. Oh, honey. :( I'm so sorry you deal with this. It's awful and shitty and sucky. xoxo

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  2. I usually just lurk here, but this one is intense. This is a horrible thing to live with. I know three people who have migraines fairly regularly, but none of them has ever described them to me. I'm sorry this happens to you!

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  3. I'm not sure that you lost to the Beast; he beat you down pretty good, but the fact that you were able to rebound speaks volumes.

    My migraines lay me up for DAYS, there's no way I would have been fit company by dinnertime.

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