Monday, September 6, 2010

Exposed nipples and belly button sweat. Serious stuff.

So, I was gabbing with my coworkers today because we had a little bit of down time, which is always nice.

We were replaying some of the highlights of a wedding we recently attended. It was one of the best wedding receptions ever. There was an open bar and a photo booth. Two things that probably shouldn't go together.

We had just finished the salads when a photo circulated of one particular coworker shirtless, licking his own nipple.

Frankly, I was impressed with his flexibility.

Moments later, a second photo circulated of the same coworker, still shirtless, but with the breast of a female coworker in his mouth.

I figured it would take at least two courses before such photos would be circulating. These two didn't even wait for the entree!

Now, some have argued that the breast in question was covered by a flesh covered bra. I have my doubts.

It doesn't really matter to me though. Covered or not, your breast is still in the mouth of a coworker you aren't even dating and the photographic evidence has been viewed by half the people you work with.

I'm pretty sure you won't live that down anytime soon.

I wonder if she's planning on topping that for the Christmas party?

Anywaytoomanyeggnogs, our other major topic of discussion was an issue about deodorant.

Yeah. I know. Nipples and deodorant. Down time is a dangerous thing in the psych crisis unit.

Our male coworker shared that a female friend of his applies deodorant just above her belly button because she believes that it keeps her from sweating.
It's true.

My response? 'Well, does she wear it under her arms too?'

He thought this was a weird question. My female coworker actually asked the exact same question. It's like we share a brain. Scary.

Now, I know that I'm inappropriate 87% of the time. However, I do not feel that this particular question was inappropriate. It's an important follow up question.

I need to know if she truly believes that this is the central sweat prevention spot on her body, controlling all of her sweat glands and therefore eliminating the need to apply deodorant anywhere else.

Or, does she have some sort of weird sweat issue just above her belly button that requires the application of deodorant to prevent odd sweat stains on her belly.

Unfortunately, he did not have the answers for me and I left to wonder.

These are the random things that consume us when we are not consumed by mental health crises.

So, tell me peeps...
What's the craziest thing you've ever done during a social outing with coworkers?
And is there photographic evidence?


  1. That is a little strange. And I would like to know the answer to said question as well.

  2. Ive been told there are no photos (wink)

  3. Yikes.
    I've been to two open bar/photobooth weddings and nothing that scandalous ever came out of either of them. You have a much more interesting workplace than I do. :)

  4. I am so boring. I broke out in a cold sweat last night because I knowingly trespassed on private property. The chances of me getting rip-roaring, stuffing my nipple in a coworker's mouth drunk is...uh...non-existent. And the chances of there being photographic evidence, even les..

  5. When I did have a job with co-workers, I never had any experiences like this. Makes my life seem all the more boring really. And sheltered. Not that I'd want to see photos of some co-worker's nips in another co-worker's mouth, but it's better than a boring game of charades or something equally banal. At least they were having fun, eh? And it could have been worse.They could have been playing Naked Twister. Eww.


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