I'm going to need meds. Stat.

My last post was August 11.

Sheesh.

You would think I was busy planning a wedding and going insane from all of the nuptial nonsense.

Well, I totally am.

This sh*t is hard! It consumes you. It consumes your life. It's like a leech that just sucks all of the time, energy, money and sanity directly from your soul.

I mean...it's the happiest day of my life. Yay?

It is. Don't worry. I'm not saying that.

I'm just saying that I'm being consumed by the nuptial nonsense that precedes the happiest day of my life.

Oh yeah...in the midst of all the nuptial nonsense and it's consumption of my soul? My Siberian Princess decides to officially become a senior citizen.

She was diagnosed with Cognitive Dysfunction Syndrome today. It's basically Alzheimer's Disease in canine form.

Awesome.

If you add that to her deteriorating back leg and hip function and her urinary incontinence, I think you can safely say she's an old lady.

(tear)

My poor little Siberian Princess.

We had a really rough night last night, the Princess and I. She was essentially pacing all night, which is not unusual for her. Last night, she was also very disoriented and struggling to walk.

She was having a lot of trouble keeping herself up on her back end. When she stopped pacing, she would just kinda stand there and her back end would slowly start to drop. Either that or her back legs would splay out like Bambi on the ice.

It was pitiful to watch. There were several times when she just went 'phoomph' down on the floor and just stayed there. She looked completely uncomfortable because she couldn't settle herself into her bed like she normally does. She just landed and that was it.

She had trouble getting herself back up when she landed and I lifted her a few times. For a dog that hates to be touched, she tolerated it pretty well.

In addition to the 'phoomphing', she was having episodes of confusion. She would get herself stuck in a corner and couldn't figure out how to get herself out.

At one point, she woke me up because she was on the floor with her face in the corner of the headboard. I think she got up from her bed with the intent to pace a little. I'm not sure how that turned into her getting stuck in a corner, but it did. She was whining because she couldn't understand why continuing to push her face into the wall did not equal getting unstuck.

I can't even begin to tell you how much my heart broke at that very moment.

I lifted her up and pointed her in the right direction, fighting back tears as I did so. When she righted herself enough to pace, she paced out into the living room.

After a few minutes, I no longer heard the jingling of her tags. I also had not heard a 'phoomph'. When I went out to look for her, I didn't see her anywhere.

Upon closer inspection, I saw her lying on the floor under the dining room table. She didn't make a sound. It looked as though she had been pacing over there, on her normal pacing path, and got stuck. Since no one was there to free her, she just flopped.

Again, my heart broke as I lifted her up and got her situated.

We had a couple more incidents like that before she finally got settled into her bed.

She had a vet appointment this morning and we shared all of this with her. The vet thinks she is just losing some of her brain function due to aging. She suggested some supplements that might help. She is also starting her on anti-inflammatory medication for the hip and back end pain.

I realize that these things might not get better. They might get much worse for my Princess. All we can do is try our best to make her comfortable and help her maintain the quality of life she deserves.

Oh God.

I can't even believe those words are being uttered. This is so not what I was hoping for my Princess. She has been through so much in her life that we don't even know about. I don't want her to have to experience any more pain or struggle.

She's going to have good days and bad days from now on. The medications will help and I can only hope and pray that they work well enough to allow her to feel like herself again.

I ask that you hope and pray right along with me.