So, I've been in a bit of a funk lately.
It's been lingering for awhile but it seems to have really set in over the past week or so.
It's not the kind of funk where I'm in my pajamas, unbathed for days at a time watching reruns of Lifetime. It's more the kind of funk where I am just frustrated with the stagnation in my life and I don't see any hope.
Yay!
I'm 35 years old (yeah, I said it) and I feel like I should be a lot further along with my life goals than I am.
I'm engaged to a man I truly love. We own a home together. We have our gorgeous pup. We have good friends and try to have fun no matter what we do.
It just seems like we can't get ahead.
We are both disgruntled with our government jobs - sh*t money, political bullsh*t, no chance for advancement, no motivation to achieve or care - you get the idea.
It's so discouraging to keep working and just getting nowhere. We continue to live paycheck to paycheck, watching every penny. We actually manage to get a little something set aside and then we get a tax bill that sucks it all up. We start to feel like things are stabilizing and the city does furloughs.
When will it end?!
We aren't asking to be millionaires. We just want to be able to live comfortably. We want to be able to put that fence up in the yard. We want to be able to fix the siding. Replace the front foor. Finish the spare room. Take a weekend to Gettysburg. Go out to dinner once in awhile and not stress over the tab.
Do any of those little things that normal people do.
We also want to be able to go back to school and further ourselves and our careers.
None of that is likely to happen anytime soon though.
We are stuck.
Just stuck. And it sucks.
I want to curl up in my Snuggie with a batch of cupcakes, a case of beer and the remote. Unfortunately, I have to carry on.
I've found that suppressing all the frustration and digruntledness isn't entirely healthy. Sarcasm seems to work okay.
Also, it's Shark Week. That's helping.
It's the little things.
"I've found that suppressing all the frustration and digruntledness isn't entirely healthy."
ReplyDeleteOh dear heart, it most certainly isn't. I know everyone reacts to stress differently, but you HAVE to get it out - I gained approx. 20lbs in just three months internalizing my stress. It will f*ck up you body faster than you can say Jagerbomb. :(
Get it out, however you can: talk to someone, blog it out, shoot me an email if you want (I'm ALWAYS available to listen - hell, I'll even attempt to figure out Skype if you want actual *talking*).
Sending love. xoxo
Shark Week pretty much cures all ailments. I've been glued to the TV since 9pm on Sunday.
ReplyDeleteMaybe a career change is in the cards for you? Even just looking at other options to see what might be out there can help!
I'm starting to think that "those things normal people do" are the things that you do, as in not go out to dinner very often, watch every penny and live paycheck to paycheck.
ReplyDeleteI'm in the same boat as you. I don't have a government job (actually, I'm not going to lie, I really like my job) but PJ hates his job and does it because we can't afford for him not to. We live paychekc to paycheck, nevermind our debt. we just met with a financial planner on the weekend... OMG what a headach that was. not only did we talk about debt, income blah blah but then he mentions death.
DEATH?! Really? I've just started my life - can't we talk about death later?
I hear ya. It is so difficult right now.
ReplyDeleteShark Week?!!?!
gotta go...
Hope it feels better, soon...
ReplyDelete