Friday, May 7, 2010

I blame Sharon Stone.

I had every intention of playing along with memes yesterday. There was Girl Talk Thursday's Prom Prom Prominator, Mama Kat's Writer's Worskshop and Think Tank Momma's new Share a Spoon . All of these had their appeal but TOM was just wreaking havoc on my sanity, preventing me from forming a coherent post for either prompt.
I've been on kind of an emotional roller coaster for the past few days.
It started when my brother emailed to tell me that his 3 dogs, my canine niece and nephews, had killed a raccoon. They were awaiting a call from Animal Control and if the raccoon was rabid, all 3 dogs would have to be put down.
Omg, right?
It was torture. I love these dogs like they were my own. It's how we are in my family. We're dog people. The thought of having to put all 3 dogs down was breaking my heart.
The potential heartbreak paired with TOM was making me a little crazy. I reorganized MB's closet in order to refocus my heartbreak and channel my craziness. Folding underwear can be very therapeutic.
I tried to write, but it just wasn't happening.
Thank God, the raccoon wasn't rabid and the pups are saved!
Unfortunately the TOM induced craziness has lingered even though the potential tragedy has passed.
I have a suspicious mole on my face and according to the internet, I have Basal Cell Carcinoma. I was only looking it up because I wanted to find a picture that matched how red and gross my mole was a few days ago as it has since become less red and I want the doctor to see it in it's full grossness. MB thinks it's weird that I'm printing out pictures of gross moles. I think I'm just being a responsible patient.
I awoke this morning and enjoyed a nice bowl of light ice cream while watching the Criminal Minds and SVU episodes I recorded this week. I struggled through SVU because I think I hate Sharon Stone. She's on there now if you haven't been watching.
So, then I proceed to feed the fishes which led to a very thorough TOM craziness induced cleaning of the pump and filter. This then led to pulling weeds around the pond which led to sadness at the puppy next door who only has a soda can and mop to play with.
My pulling weeds came to an abrupt end when I encountered the biggest effing spider I've ever seen mere inches from my bare foot.
I'm pretty sure some of the weeds I pulled were poisonous because I immediately noticed red spots on my left forearm, right elbow, right ankle and left calf. Why these particular areas, I don't know.
I took some Benadryl, ate an Edy's frozen fruit bar and watched The Real Housewives of NJ. Then I broke the remote somehow and MB came home to find me watching Beowulf because it came on after Housewives and I couldn't change the channel. I hate Beowulf. Sad.
He saw that my new hiking boots (that I got for half off, woohoo) were out and this conversation is what followed:
MB: Did you go hiking today?
Me: I was just trying on my new boots to see how they would look with the hiking pants I got from Goodwill which are perfect or will be at least when I lose 5 pounds but that's okay because I have another pair that is perfect right now except that they are a little short but that's okay because you can't really tell with the boots on.
MB: Was any of that English?
Me: Oh. No, I did not go hiking today.
MB: (sigh)
He could tell that the TOM craziness had not passed yet so he took me out for beer and bar food.
I feel like I'm coming down a little bit.
Of course, we are supposed to be going to West Virginia this weekend to visit MB's mom. MB thinks it's funny to not tell me what time we are leaving so I can go even more insane.
It's like he doesn't understand my ocd at all.
I think I'm just going to throw fish food at him until he tells me what the plan is.
I'll probably be offline while we are at MB's mom's house. She has a farm in the mountains and it's gorgeous. I hope we get to hike a little. I'll be sure and take pictures to share.
Happy Mother's Day to all the Moms out there!
Happy Weekend to all!
*I have tried respacing this post 7 times with no success. I apologize that Blogger hates you and wants you to read this without spacing. Sometimes they really are bastards.


  1. I'm telling you it's the Google Gnomes. I hate those little effers! They move my stuff all the time too!

  2. Girl. I feel your pain. And yes, I find organizing and folding therapeutic in such moments. I think it's time you join the flip-off friday movement.

    You know- forum specifically designed for the weekly rants. Novel idea, don't ya think?

    Enjoy your trip.

  3. "MB thinks it's funny to not tell me what time we are leaving so I can go even more insane."

    Yup. It's confirmed: MB & Chebbar are far more similar than we first thought.

    Sorry the TOM crazies. I hate those whore moans. *big, fat, squooshy bewbie hugs & chocolate*

  4. OK, I'm visiting your blog from the SITS BlogFrog, and you are nothing short of hilarious. Awesome blog, totally following you now... :3

    I pulled weeds today too, it sucked. I didn't get the rash though, just the sore fingertips.


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