Tuesday, April 13, 2010

Public meltdown

I ran into an old friend this weekend and was reminded of a dark time in my life. It's always nice to run into old friends who like to drudge up that kind of stuff, isn't it?
No harm though. It was a dark time that we managed to make light of and that's what we did again this time.
I was in my 20's, maybe 21 when I had my very first public breakdown and frightened unsuspecting travelers.
It was in the resort town I grew up in and it was mid-summer. Tourists everywhere. Not always my favorite time of the year. What can you do, though? People like to come to the beach.
Anywhycantyoufindanotherbeachandstopbotheringme, I was on the bridge coming into town when I got sideswiped.
The important part of this story is that I had just been rear ended a couple days before this. Some drunk bitch ran into me at a red light and then blamed me for stopping in front of her. Red light. Duh.
She was so drunk she couldn't even stand up. What did the responding officer do?
That's right. I tried to point out that she was drunk and not capable of driving, etc. He said he didn't want to get involved.
I said some very unkind things about his lack of job skills and surprisingly didn't get arrested. I just got to drive away with a smashed up rear end. She got to go home and sleep it off.
Yay for justice!
This was also after another asshole who was slightly less drunk than that bitch, ran into me as I was stalled at a traffic light. Stalled. Emergency flashers engaged and all. What did the responding officer do?
You guessed it.
Anyworthlesssummerrentacops, it was a couple days later and I get rear ended by a car full of high school seniors coming down to party at the beach.
When it happened, I was in traffic on the bridge. Cars and witnesses everywhere.
The seniors obviously needed to be in my lane pretty damn quickly and just figured they'd come on over without looking.
Super smart.
So, it happens.
And I freak.
I immediately get out of my car right there on the bridge, slam the door and commence the freaking out.
It was classic. There was a lot of eff this, eff you, you sons of bitches, stupid assholes, who the hell do you think you are, can't effing drive, don't effing care about anyone else on the road, I don't effing believe you just did this, what the eff were you thinking, you gd little rat bastards, why don't you effing look where the eff you are going, wtf is wrong with you...
You get the idea.
Now, you have to understand that the high schoolers haven't gotten out of their car. It's just me. Ranting to myself and my smashed up car in the middle of traffic on the bridge.
I finish my little rant, but I am still fuming. I get back in my car and proceed to rant as I punch the steering wheel a few times.
The high schoolers are in their car right in front of me watching everything and squirming with terror. I can't imagine what they thought I was going to do to them after my little tirade.
We pulled over once traffic started moving and exchanged information. I don't remember speaking full sentences to them. I think it was just a series of grunts and nods and sneers as I snatched the insurance cards from their shaking hands.
Not my proudest moment.
I didn't care. I had reached my breaking point.
My friend likes to say that I was accident prone.
I like to say that I was just an innocent victim of jackassery.
Tomato. Potato.
Or something.

1 comment:

  1. Geeze... that is a lot of car crap. Those high schoolers were probably in shock and terror. At least you can look back on it and laugh. The story did make me chuckle.


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