Thursday, November 5, 2009

Furry xanax.

Sometimes the behavior of others still surprises me. And not always in a good way, like with my pup. She constantly does things that pleasantly surprise me. Of course, sometimes her behaviors leave me questioning if she has Canine Dissociative Disorder or if she has become a pod for some sort of alien life form.
For example, last night. I was sitting on the sofa switching purses (as is my prerogative since I own different purses for different needs and can change them up as I see fit without having to apologize to any naysayers who may live in my home and choose to judge me) and watching Criminal Minds.
The pup often hovers around me, especially if I have food. She often nudges me for pets, too when she is feeling particularly affectionate. This drives the betrothed crazy since most of the time she doesn't even care if he's home or not.
She rarely chooses to engage in any close contact or snuggling. She's just not that type of dog. I blame her previous neglectful owners and her years of street life as a result of said neglectful owners.
So, of course it shocked me when out of the blue, she jumped up into my lap! She even stayed there for a few minutes, nuzzling and getting belly rubs. It was one of those Awww moments that really make my day.
And I needed that after my recent interactions with people.
I had just come from the library, which is supposed to be universally respected as a quiet zone. I mean, who doesn't know to shut up when in the library. I sometimes feel bad wearing flip flops in there because I fell like people are glaring at me.
'Stupid ho-bag flipping and flopping in here like she owns the place and people aren't in here trying to read. Bitch'
I'm always prepared for the ensuing argument and potential fist fight such a comment would result in.
This time, it wasn't me or my footwear causing a disturbance.
I was innocently trying to check out with my books when I heard the yelling at the counter. Apparently, this woman did not understand the quiet rules. And apparently, she didn't believe that her 2yo son should have to pay the overdue book fines he had accumulated. She seemed to believe that the librarian was falsifying records in order to ruin the credit of a 2yo. The issue never did get resolved and the woman left, yelling the whole way out.
After the fact, I envisioned myself approaching the woman and spitting 'SHHHHHHHHHH' into her face until she ceased her ranting. And then I envisioned her stabbing me in the eyeball with her artificial nails. Best that I didn't get involved.
It's a good thing I have such an awww-inspiring pup at home. It's probably what keeps me from killing people who yell at librarians.
Or wear pajama pants to the grocery store.
Or change lanes without signaling.
Or block the entire produce aisle so I can't get one freakin tomato.
Or leave the car with no gas in it (although I can't prove that wasn't me).
Or throw lit cigarette butts on the ground.
Or spit right where I'm walking.
OMG! I think I need more dogs! Or a heavy dose of anti-anxiety meds to be taken as needed when encountering jackasses.

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