Saturday, February 5, 2011

The Slim a Bear incident, revisited.

Back in November 2009, I submitted a winning post on The One Minute Writer. In lieu of some recent events in my household (which you will be reading about later), I have decided to revisit that post. It is what MB and I like to refer to as The Slim A Bear Incident.

If you are not familiar with Slim A Bears, they are a delicious ice cream treat made by Klondike that are 100 calories each.

Yummy, right?

Well, read on to see why we don't buy them anymore and why I'm the luckiest woman on Earth...

I was snuggled up on the couch watching tv when he came home. I already knew that I was guilty. I was just hoping that it would take him a couple days to figure out what I was guilty of and by then, I would've hidden the evidence.
But no such luck. He went for the freezer right away.

"Ummm, baby?"

I had no choice to respond. I was busted and I knew it. "Yes?"

"What happened to the box of ice cream bars we just bought yesterday?"

Oh God. Here we go. Try to lie first. "I don't know, they aren't in there?"


Lies have failed. "Ohhhhh. You mean the low fat klondike bar rip offs? I made a small sundae with some of then."

"Baby, there were 6 bars in the box. You're telling me you ate all 6 bars in one sitting?"

For crying out loud, now he's judging me. "You see, it's not what it looks like."

"Really? Because it looks like you ate an entire box of ice cream bars."

Oh boy. "Well, yeah. That's what it looks like, but it was an accident."

"You mean, somehow an entire box of ice cream bars accidentally found themselves inside your stomach? How exactly does that happen?"

I have to think a minute on this one. It was a pretty stressful day, but he probably won't buy that, being non-female and all. "Well. Here's what happened: I sampled one of the bars and it was really good."

"Uh huh."

"So, I thought how delicious would these be smushed up with some chocolate syrup on top, like a little sundae. Sounds good, right?"

"Uh huh."

"So, I tried that and as expected, it was delicious. So, somehow after I had the first one, I must've forgotten I already had it and made another one."

"With the entire box."

"Yep. See, it was all an accident. And it really isn't my fault anyway."

"Uh huh."

"It's really my coworker's fault. She was sick today and I had to pick up all of her patients and it doubled my grocery store run, causing us to be super late and tie up 3 lanes in the checkout and all the shoppers gave us dirty looks and it was awful."

"Uh huh. You work with the mentally ill. Your job is never predictable."

"I know, but it's still stressful and I need some release."

"Uh huh."

"If it makes you feel any better, I don't think you would've liked them at all."

"Well, we'll never know. Because you have no self control."

Ouch. But completely true. "Well, because sometimes accidents happen. Like how we accidentally met and then fell deeply in love."


"I thought so."

"You are forgiven."

I am so lucky that MB is such an understanding person. ;)

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